By Tinky Ningombam
Out of the million times that someone asks me my name and then asks me what it means? I normally shrug it off and say “I don’t know”. Every time I do, I question myself with the oh-so-known syndrome, the “Who am I?” syndrome that everyone is so familiar with. I have been mocked with my name, been told “ohhh, its soooo cuuuute” so many times that now I know how to react to it, most of the times it is not a pleasant stare that I give back.
It all begins with the name.
Before these idiosyncracies, the paradigms, the world. I have read that names can affect a child, change the way he/she develops his/her personality. Which roughly translates to the logic that a guy with a name “Superman” is atleast at some point of his life going to test his great strength , likewise a girl named “Ayingbi” will perhaps try to be serene, mellow.
I have heard a lot of bizarre names in Manipur in my lifetime. Just a couple of questions around the room and I hear people telling me of people they know with different names. Names ranging from Volcano, Moscow, Romania, Russia, Zangor, Turkey, Oui , Japan, Lafoi, Atom, Molecule, Cowboy, Heroman , Leopoker, Finish, Nokia… etc. The list gets never-ending. Most of these interesting names are from the 60’s to 70’s babies, which pretty much explains some of its eccentricity ( I mean who can discount the flower power era and disco ball phase). However people even now have not stopped to experiment. I see a growing amount of people not willing to try traditional names or common names, perhaps in a hope to make their kids stand out, well too much, I must add. So we have a growing amount of name distortions and experimentations (forgetting that it is infact their kid they are naming) in the search to find something unique and different for the kids.
My folks thought it best to name me and brother starting with the same letter. It is normally an age-old accepted tradition. I think it is done to remind us of the fact that “Yes, we are indeed born of the same blood”. I think they thought it was cute. First of all, I personally think it is quite irritating to have your siblings to share a similar syntax, a prefix, a suffix, leave alone a starting letter. It gets pretty embarrassing when you introduce yourself to people who think its again “Cute”. I think we grow out of the cute stage pretty much when we were 10.
But honestly, I did always like my name, unlike my friends with more crazy names who used to crib over theirs. Name-cribbing is not a new phenomenon. But I guess your moment of reckoning, your so-called moment of truth comes some day or the other and then you say “Hey, this is me!” It is easier to change your name nowadays. People are more educated and know they can actually do away with a name that he/she does not like. In all these, most girls are okay with eccentric names. Sociologically, its claimed that more girls are named differently and so it is less awkward for them to deal with an uncommon name.
I do believe that nomenclature is indeed the most vital aspect for a person , both psychologically as well as sociologically. As of today, we see a growing amount of people reviving indigenous names. And also more kids also accepting typical names that were considered “old-fashioned” just a decade ago. I remember we used to think of a “Sanatomba” or a “Gangumei” as an uncool name before while we would think a Bobby or a Richard was hip. Now, in the present day, I am more keen to appreciate a Chingthangkhombi or a Linthoingambi and immediately develop a connect as brethren. I do not say that we should not have a particular set of names or that western names are less appealing. I also do not believe in fundamentalist revivalist ethos of changing all our names to indigenous names as the way forward. Infact, being a Manipuri, a meetei , I do not possess a meetei name but I would not change my name either. Because I have grown to become “Me” and my name has become indispensible, even reflective of my personality.
We should see that kids are named with a long termed objective. Applepie as a name might be cute when he is a baby but not when he is Vice President of the Company. Or it would be a little weird to have a Ningombam Nokia Singh to become the next President. ( I think by conscious choice, there will be serious doubt hovering over people’s head.) Names are the first interface of you and the other person. It should reflect the “individual”. It should STAND for what you are. Why do you think most artistes change their names before they hit headlines? My only appeal is for people to think long-term and see your kid , place him wherever you aspire him to be , in London, in the US , in UAE, wherever, and have a little caution in picking a name which might not embarrass him/her as he grows up. Choosing names that will not induce people to bully your kids, names that will make your kid stand out without being mocked at; names that will build your kid’s personality. Unless they are born to become artistes so that it will be cool to be called a “Tapta” , or rappers, so you can call your kids T-pain, Puff Daddy, SnoopDog or a Dr. Dre. But if that is not your intention, let’s give more thought to naming your babies. For the sake of everyone!
(The columnist would like to express her most sincere apologies to any of her readers who has the same names as she knowingly or unknowingly ridiculed. It does not matter, however, if they do not subscribe to the paper or read the column. In fact, then, she wishes to make more fun of them.)