Yesterday was Mother’s day. One way of looking at such an observation is to scoff at the idea of marking out one single day to highlight the role of such an integral person as a mother in one’s life. The other is to quietly follow the herd mentality and give in to the market forces of buying cards, gifts and public declarations of maternal love and respect on social networking sites. In doing so, the value of relationships gets lost under the barrage of consumerist onslaught that has usurped the consciousness of the society today. The hold of market forces over observations marking out special days for friendship, love, parenthood and others has reached a stage where anyone missing out on sending out a wish, greeting card or gift is pressured into thinking that he/she has lot out on the meaning of the day and its significance. Ironically enough, the sheen of consumerism and market forces playing into social and family relations is not just limited to observations originating from the West but to our very own traditional and cultural occasions like Ningol Chakouba and Cheiraoba where the value of the gifts and presents exchanged are being minutely valued and compared. To come back to the observation of Mother`s Day, which started in the US, it is seen as having its roots in various women peace groups getting together during the American Civil War. These women were groups of mothers whose sons had fought against one another or died fighting against the other on opposing sides. But a day was not yet marked out in a sense and there was no broad based observation till the time a woman called Anna Jarvis, daughter of Anna Reeves Jarvis, who had moved from Grafton, West Virginia, to Philadelphia held a memorial for her mother in 1908. Her campaign to mark a ‘Mother’s Day’ a recognized holiday in the United States became successful in 1914. Tellingly enough, she was already disappointed with its commercialization by the 1920s. But the commercialization of the day egged on by event management houses, the greeting card industry and others led to the day being adopted in various other countries of the world.
Manipur in a sense do not need an additional Mothers’ Day given that there are already two days to mark the much heralded the existence of Meira Paibis. And even though the said two days will not see much attention beyond the confines of the state, it goes without saying that there is a need and urgency to look beyond token observations even with these said two days, beginning with looking at one day being marked instead of two. But more than marking out a day or two, what will be more significant for women in the state and more so for the Meira Paibi community is to look at whether they are to stand for the cause of women per so or for women divided on lines of community, ethnicity and political identity. More than ever, the women in Manipur need to embrace one another blurring the lines that divide and demand for their voices to be heard. It is time they give expressions to why they should not be involved in decision making but kept as foot soldiers when agitations on the streets are called for. A mothers’ day for the women of Manipur who are mothers would be meaningful only when each one can sleep peacefully knowing that they are being heard and revered. For this to happen, the mothers would have to first join hands amongst themselves and close ranks with others hailing from other communities. Only when mothers of sons unite in their grief, anger and frustration can perhaps, a change settle in.
For long, the women of Manipur has been glossed over with tales of historical stories going back to the Nupi Lals even as the present situation of women is nothing to write about. We have seen all too well how women leaders and our mothers are heading into mob justice on one hand while becoming moral custodians and on convenient silent mode when it suits the interest of certain groups. This would need to be changed to a new social and political order where women leaders and the mothers set the terms of peace and reconciliation, wherein they ensure police and legal systems are going on track by getting involved in legal processes. Perhaps then, Mother’s day can acquire the intent and meaning it started out in a foreign country all those years ago.